I’ve never seen more than one answered.
I wonder if people aren’t getting them…
or just don’t care.
Either way, I hope you all have a fabulous day, because you deserve it. I know, 90% of you reading this are thinking, “not me, but good luck everyone else!” But I want it specifically for you 90%. You 90% that haven’t had one in a while. It doesn’t have to be the perfect day, but I hope that you all laugh at the silly costumes, or smile at the changing trees, or are enjoying a beach (if you’re southern hemisphere ;))
Feeling more disconnected from everyone each day. Completely detached and very alone. I wish I knew what was happening to me.
And my non-US followers too, though it won’t mean very much =]
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I love this girl so much<3
She told me that it was great I stopped my Geodon (anti-psychotic) on my own.
Even though I told her I was eating less than 500 calories a day typically, she said my weightloss was probably because of the Geodon. I felt like dying in that instant. Like all the work I had done was for nothing. Was because of a stupid fucking pill, and its chemicals not working on me. I felt like a failure.
Then when I told her I was taking a stress management class in my schedule, she decided mindfulness would be better than my panic attack medication.
I’m not okay. I feel like I’m drowning in feelings and emotions some days. I need my panic attack medication some times. It’s not like I take one a day….it’s when I’m standing in the doorway, unable to leave for school on my own. I typically had just got done throwing up multiple times, and am having a panic attack about people looking at me, seeing me, talking to me. About people hating me, about being late for class. About possibly falling on my walk to class. About people judging me based on my cane.
About being fat and disgusting, and the only control I apparently have over it is to stop taking my anti-psychotics.
Some days….I want to die. I told her that, she said “well, it’s not really depression”
I’m drowning in emotions, and I’m not okay. I’m not okay. I’m not okay. I’m not okay. I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.I’m not okay.